I Married Too Young

Are you considering marrying at a young age? You may want to read this first:


I met him when I was 16 years old and we became fast friends. I lived in another state, so after I went home we kept in touch by instant message on the Internet. When I graduated high school I needed a place to live and moved in with my mom back in Ohio, where James happened to live. Not long after I moved James and I went out for dinner to catch up. Dinner turned into a long affair and the entire night turned into a date. That was how it began.

We married only weeks after I had turned 19. My family did not approve, so they did not attend our courthouse wedding. I ignored the mountains of people that told us that we were too young. After all, we were made for each other, soul mates, and it was fate. Everything worked with us, things were easy…

Within three months I had left him from another man who we will call M. I stayed friends with James and after a year or so I went back to James, we never had gotten a divorce.

Everything was perfect after I went back to James and within a short while I became pregnant. We became parents in December of 2005. By then the changes were becoming obvious. James had become focused on work and I was becoming mentally unstable with a slowly growing addiction problem. James and I no longer talked or smiled. We no longer felt the same about each other. We went through the motions until May of 2009 when I had a total hysterectomy. I was now even more mentally unstable and going through menopause. I moved out to take a break from the chaos.

I entered rehab for a few months and then moved from place to place in search of a “home”. Once I had been gone over a year I didn’t want to do it anymore. I had been in and out multiple times, each time it would get bad and I would need to leave again. There is a point you realize it will never work out.  I wanted more out of life than being married to James would allow. I would never be happy in my father in-law’s house, and we would never afford to move out. I asked James for a divorce.

Our divorce was final in August of 2011, he and I are both in relationships filled with love and respect (and other people of course)

The people who got married in May of 2002 are two completely different people than the two that they became.

People change as they grow up, this doesn’t always allow a marriage to work.

(This is my humble opinion)


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