Well, I planned on writing a post about self-harmin the youngest ones or maybe even people’s obsessions with the Kardashians. Who knows now because, there has only been two words on my mind all night long, “Insomnia!” and “Sleep! Please?” Okay, three words.
When I was young it never made sense to me that people would not sleep at night. Of course, back then I assumed it had to be 100% optional. As I started turning into a teenager, I realized what insomnia meant.
This episode is one of my longer ones, but it is still my fault and mine alone. Monday night I stayed up all night trying to catch up on the schoolwork that I missed last week. I did not catch up anyway.
I have a saying about myself, “The less sleep that I get, the less that I need, and then I get even less.” Basically by pulling an all-nighter studying I triggered a cycle that it just seems will have to run its course. My job is to hold it together until then and function the best that I can. And study some more, of course.
The last time that I woke up was at 5:00am Monday morning. It is currently 7:30am Thursday morning. I say “morning” loosely of course. Time just runs into itself at this point.
The important thing for me to do now is rest. Have a good day/weekend.
Update: I have not left the couch today except to move to the floor and back. I have barely gotten any schoolwork done, but at least I no longer feel like I am going to fall out at any time. Tonight, I am going to bed early and I will not move until I sleep or the sun returns. If I go another night without sleep it will be time to call the doctor. My biggest struggle right now is my anger, temper and lack of patience. But that is to be expected too. Thank you for all your kind words today!